1. Get born
2. Breath some air
3. Once they give you a crayon, start drawing on everything
4. When they take your crayons away, make shapes with your peas and carrots or whatever
5. Laugh at everything
6. Stare at the sun
7. go underwater with your eyes open
8. listen to the dog’s heart for hours
9. listen to the cat’s heart for a split
second before it runs away
10. learn some of the alphabet
11. notice that things don’t always float
12. ride a BMX or something through weird trails.
13. learn a few numbers
14. when they mention the moon, remember that it is a) made of cheese, b) somewhere we never went
15. don’t get a haircut
16. get in a fist fight on the school bus with whoever will have you
17. fall out of a tree and break something.
18. kiss other humans
19. learn the rest of the alphabet
20. drink some water
21. go to a funeral in a Hawaiian shirt if they’ll let you.
22. try to levitate. just try. you never know.
23. lose some teeth
24. get some new teeth
25. play music everywhere all the time underneath everything
26. dream about neon death without pain
27. eat fire for lunch
28. graduate grammar school
29. carve things into dead wood
30. spell out S.O.S. in chicken bones
31. rhyme everything with orange
32. watch Goonies again
33. read books about anything but books
34. spit off a watertower onto the high tension powerlines.
35. do a backflip off a tire swing into a silver lake
36. go to the prom with a cardboard cut out of yourself
37. don’t go to college yet
38. drive around aimlessly through America
39. yell into caves
40. find a nice graveyard and make sure your tombstone isn’t there
41. go to college
42. Look for drugs
43. If you can’t find any, start selling drugs there
44. Invest your drug money in a nice suit
45. Also get a notebook
46. And a pen
47. write a poem
48. do you like it?
49. ok, you made it, you made a poem.
50. You’re done. You win.